Aw, they’re adulting!
My aunt cracked that joke at Christmas dinner when Joe and I presented our hosts with our homemade wine. It pretty much sums up how I’ve felt over the eight months since I graduated. I’ve been doing adult things, without actually growing up and being an adult.
Out of my fourth year class (of about 20 people, mind you), I think there are only two or three of us that actually left school this past May. The rest are either finishing up their degrees, in Teachers’ College, or went straight on to a Masters or a PhD. The volume of Facebook posts about exams in the past month from people exactly my age brought on nostalgia and relief… and this sense that something’s missing in my yearly routine. For the first time ever, I’m not heading back to school after Christmas! But everyone else is…?
Then, of course, there’s the opposite end of the spectrum: the magic unicorns on Facebook that…
- Landed their dream job
- Became intense, successful entrepreneurs
- Got, or are about to get, married (or even have kids…)
And suddenly I’m thinking, did I do something wrong? Am I not growing up fast enough? I now have this unpleasant combination of “Who do you think you are?” and “Why are you so behind?” swirling around in my head.
When I really consider it, I know that there is no such thing as the mystical moment, achievement, or milestone that carries you directly from Youth to Adulthood. And, obviously, polished Facebook profiles are the absolute worst thing to compare yourself to. Yet, after spending 75% of my life being evaluated and graded against standards based on my peers, it’s pretty hard to let the whole “comparison” thing go. Like I’ve stated elsewhere on this blog, I really don’t have a clue what I ultimately want to do with my life, so it makes sense that I’m in this uncomfortable limbo between life stages. But am I the only one that feels really weird about it?
Not to mention my domestic hobbies making me look like an old lady trapped in a kid’s body. To each their own, right?
…I’m going to go knit my cat a blanket now.